Archive for November, 2010

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WikiLeak Wik Wik Wiki Wiki Wik!

Posted in apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, politics, The Homeland, torture, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 30, 2010 by lens1

With all apologies to my Hip-Hop friends…wik wik, wiki wiki wik, the world as we know it may end, not due to endless wars, torture or the crimes of Bush, Obama and Hillary…but due to truthiness escaping from a wik wik WikiLeak.

World…meet Carla Axtman.  Carla, world, world Carla…now let us also meet Keith Thomson.  Keith meet Carla.  Carla, Keith…world…Keith…Carla…Keith.

Keith and Carla are two birds of a feather and when two birds get together, they usually tend to shit on something.

Carla fears that the man-child/FBI created terrorist from Corvallis, might be up to something because the FBI made it so.  Keith is a pretend journalist from the Huffington Post and other useless progressive outlets, who believes that the truthiness slowly spewing from WikiLeaks, will somehow lead to world peace.

CIA's Mohamud

I can assure you Keith, BushBama, the Pentagon, Boeing and the various abbreviations of the Homeland…are not about to let peace break out.  See Mohamed Mohamud in Portland for more…Keith.

Hillary says that the truthiness leaking from WikiLeaks is an attack on the world.  Bill O’ Reilly says the truth leakers should be executed.

But you know Bill O’…Bush was tricked into blowing up 100′s of thousands of humans in Iraq, Vietghanistan, Pakistan and Cuba…by a CIA sting operation, just like the sting in Oregon.

Mohamud meet Bush.

Thanks for your concern Carla…Keith, but since the BushBama Doctrine is still fully erect and pounding away at the virginal flower that once contained your rights…well, your concerns are as relevant as North Korea is a threat.

In happier news…

  • Julian Assange has some information on Bank of America that might be released, as soon as Keith Thomson says it’s okay.
  • When asked about Valerie Plame, Hillary and Bill O’ both deferred to whatever it was that the Koch brothers attorneys might want them to say.
  • Reading books in Spokane is getting more difficult than paying for a decade of war.
  • Dental care in Portland?  Not had by many and it’s more difficult to fund than an FBI sting operation.

Happy Tuesday and beware of eager humans offering to fund your Jihad.  They tricked Bush, they tricked Mohamed Mohamud…they can trick you too.


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It’s Like Clockwork

Posted in apathy, change, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, The Homeland, Washington State, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 29, 2010 by lens1


I love it when a plan comes together!  Like clockwork and right on cue, the Palin has called the Australian Assange and his WikiLeaks of truthiness…unstoppable treasonous treachery, which Obama can not stop!??

Of course, like Portland Commissioner Dan Saltzman knows, the WikiLeaks only exists in the thin air of a foreign land, where the treachery is housed within the tubes and wires of the internets.  It’s also a tad difficult to prove that a treason has been committed upon the Homeland…by an Australian, but this too shall be overlooked.

Let us recap!

Sarah Palin is a babbling idiot with a Twitter, yet she could be your next president.  Portland City Commissioner Saltzman knows terror when he’s being fed terror…and zee terror must not stand!…therefore I move that Portland immediately rejoin the  Joint Terrorism Task Force, becuase the rights of the peoples only exist in China.  And stuff, and, and um, because it won’t be long until Israel starts bombing our nuclear scientists!!

Hey Oregon, keep an eye out for Capt. Timothy J. Block and those loose Bangor nukes on I-84, whilst simultaneously being vigilant for posts of FBI porn…on your Marxisty, Portland Independent Media Center.  *Snooze you lose…the post of FBI porn has now gone the way of the CIA torture tapes*

The words of Saltzman may be mine, but the plan?  She does work well, no?


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Curses! FBI Foils Self While WikiLeaks Reigns on Our Parade of Self-Awareness

Posted in apathy, change, congress, economy, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, politics, The Homeland, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 29, 2010 by lens1

Peace Sells

While the rest of Oregon deals with the terrorist stigma that the Federal Bureau of Irony has created…Portland is left between Iraq and a Federalized Police force place, to better attack the Black Bloc with.

As Mayor Sam Adams grapples with Police Chief Mike Reese, the public of PDX Town are left with nothing but a fun mental image and propaganda.

Add on to this mental image of grappling officials, about 200,000 tattooed and perpetually unemployed baristas…and you’ve got Portland…a 1992 Grunge-like Seattle, with a McMenamins brewery located in a former school on every block.

A Homeland education, poverty and beer.  No better recipe for an FBI sting operation.

In news that should be even less surprising than FBI made terrorists, WikiLeaks has enraged the lying liars of the Homeland and beyond!  Suffice to say, a few hundred patriots will scream traitor and off with Assange’s head!, while the rest of us will patiently wait for Festivus.

Boeing's Dicks

For a decent roundup on the latest crimes of our fathers and Hillary, go read Justin Raimondo’s take on it.
Then, for a fun circle jerk of a time, keep electing the capitulating Democrats who put us in these dark, Patriot Act days.

Perhaps we’d have more fun with a President Palin, or a Senator Joe Miller or some other closeted Teabanger.  I mean come on!  Really?…how hard can one dick push for Boeing instead of say impeachment, or the Bill of Rights?  Norm?  Patty? Dino…?

Oh well, I’m sure everything will work out fine, besides, it’s not like the Nukes at Bangor are going to be driven down I-5, or I-90…or even I-84, so that they can be upgraded to ensure the earths destruction or anything.

Maybe if we just ignore the treacherous WikiLeaks leakers of truthiness…maybe, just maybe, we will also not discover that Saudi Arabia’s 9/11 pilots, were able to morph themselves into AfhganiPakistanIraqIranian pilots…and then, we also won’t discover that the best friends of the House of Bush, have been financing al Qaeda to fight against our Blackwater mercenary Army, since oh I don’t know, Condi Rice?

Keeping up with the Garcia’s is hard enough, trying to keep up with all of the Homelands misdeeds…well, that’s just a bit much for my easily offended sensibilities.  From here on out, I’m just going to blame Ralph Nader, instead of Al Gore or Joe fucking Lieberman…for everything.

No, the box will be locked...

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Hazy Shade of Cheney

Posted in activism, apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, politics, The Homeland, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 28, 2010 by lens1

NK Evil Doer

It’s Sunday…do you know what a North Korean human looks like?  No?  It’s alright, Robert Mueller thinks they resemble poor, dark-skinned people from Somalia, Pakistan and Oregon, soooo you’re in good company.  Patriot.

The Teabangers may be on to something.  Now if they could only drop the racism, party affiliations and outright stupidity…maybe the rest of apathetic Homelandia would take notice?

If I had a dollar for every time Liz Cheney shit out a coherent thought, I’d be dirt poor and in the middle of an FBI sting operation…to try to make me blow shit up.

Remember patriots!, if I’m lyin, then WikiLeaks would be met with open arms and appreciative minions…for exposing the crimes of our fathers.  Not threats of prosecution from the war criminals that fear we apathetic minions, might actually revolt.

Oh man…that is funny!

Change!  It’s as if Chuck D was right.


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They Hate Us for Our Drexler

Posted in activism, anti war, apathy, change, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, politics, The Homeland, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 27, 2010 by lens1

The FBI has thwarted another attempt to kill Christmas and everything that it stands for, because the Jihadists hate that the Trail Blazers never got Clyde what he needed.

You can blame the Jihadists, I blame Jake O’ Donnell…though I should probably be blaming Chris Dudley.

Young Mohamed Mohamud was angry about our wars against Islam, the dead brown-skinned families of Vietghanistan and our Muslim President?…when in fact, he should have been angry with Chris Dudley.  
No one wants to see women and children blown to bits…while celebrating the beginning of the shopping season.  However, worrying about women and children being blown to bits in any of our non-conforming territories…doesn’t buy Jr. a new Wii, iPhone or a conscience.

Young Mohamed Mohamud, hates that our Marines fear gay humans, more than they fear the deadly 9/11 pilots, that make up the mighty Taliban Air Force.

Young Mohamed Mohamud, hates that the hidden mushroom clouds of Bush, are now the hidden mushroom clouds of Obama.

Young Mohamed Mohamud, hates that the Pentagon is spending trillions on the never-ending wars and experimental superweapons, when the crafty enemy that can not be defeated, live in mud huts and have no idea what a New York even is.

I’m fairly certain that young Mohamed Mohamud, finds it quite amusing that Alaska’s gonorrhea rate is as out of control as Sarah Palin’s basal ganglia.

Like Chicago Bulls fans of old, the Jihadists do hate us for our Drexler, even though they should probably hate us for our Chris Dudley, Boeing and Jake O’ Donnell.

None of this surprises me more than the fact that Chris Dudley could have been the governor of Oregon.  But you know…Chris could have practiced free-throws more often and your vasectomy could go horribly, painfully wrong…

The lesson to be taken away from all of this?  Quite clearly it’s practice your free-throws and buy this shirt.

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A DeLay in Justice leads to an Abramoff World

Posted in activism, apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, politics, The Homeland, Washington State, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 24, 2010 by lens1

Or…a very happy Thanksgiving to the Chippewas, the Agua Caliente, the Mississippi Choctaws and the Louisiana Choctaws from…Tom Delay!  Because Tom is as guilty as a Tim Eyman funded, dental clinic for the working poor!

Tom is facing anywhere from 2 years behind the counter in an Austin, Texas Starbucks…to 9 years making millions, while lobbying for TSA’s next terrorist probing machines to be located in libraries, colleges and polling places located in predominantly not white neighborhoods.

It really is a Tom DeLay-Jack Abramoff kind of world, where Tim Eyman and Leonard Peltier can only hope to breathe freely in it.

This year we don’t have Sarah Palin campaigning in front of the turkey slaughter to laugh at, but at least we still have Vietghanistan to ignore…North Korea to abhor and the CNN warning of the shock, while pining for the awe.

Thanks for the DeLay now pass the Tier 5 and eat the rich.


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Escondidostan

Posted in activism, apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, peace movement, The Homeland, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 23, 2010 by lens1

A CIA Droning is Next

Dateline Escondido, California…a neighborhood, a gardener and a terrorist bomb factory.  Proof positive that your TSA and Homeland Security are just whistling past the graveyard of democracy.

Billions upon billions of dollars spent every year, grabbing your crotch, reading your email, hunting “illegal’s” and infiltrating peace groups…all in a self-serving, corporate attempt to Kabuki you into giving the rich more tax breaks.

More Homelandians are killed every day by a lack of health care, than any Langley employed underwear bomber ever trained for.  Smoking, dental decay and french fries, kill more of us than any CIA trained-Iraqi pilot ever dreamed.

Escondido is to the Taliban as al Qaeda is to Odenton, Maryland.

Look for the terrorist threat level to rise to situation mauve or so…as WikiLeaks has a brand new batch of war crimes ready to be ignored by the
TSA groped masses.

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Wetsnatchee 911

Posted in apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, Northwest Politics, politics, Puritanicalville, The Homeland, Washington State, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 22, 2010 by lens1

Being that Bickleton, Washington just wrapped up ownership of one of the highly coveted, three signs of the Apatheticalypse…it makes perfect sense that Wenatchee, Washington would not sit still for this snubbing of epic proportion.

Enter…Wetsnatcheegate!

As a former resident of the area, I can assure you that Wenatchee is no Tacoma…while Tacoma is quite a bit like Wenatchee…which is why Wenatchee’s finest just tried to capture themselves some fornicators!

Wenatchee Police Sgt. Cherie Smith says, that they don’t want no prostitution nor sexin’ in their city…so they went and set themselves up a sex trap!  5 men were apprehended in the act of wanting to both improve the local economy and get themselves some dirty, dirty sexin’.

Unfortunately for the uptight Sgt. Smith, the 5 horny men were taken to the Chelan County Regional Justice Center.

Now as most folks who live near Wetsnatchee know…the horny 5 will be getting laid more in jail than they could have, had Sgt. Smith actually provided a prostitute for them.

The moral of this story is, you can take the aroma out of Tacoma, but you really can’t take the Condotta out of Wetsnatchee.

No…I think the lesson learned is that Dino Rossi lost.
Three times.
To women.
pfft.

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Three Signs of the Apatheticalypse

Posted in activism, apathy, change, economy, journalism, media, News, politics, The Homeland, Washington State, Washington State Blogs with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 22, 2010 by lens1

Iraqi Father and Son after Dissenting the Homeland

As the Homeland continues its steady slide towards the exact opposite of anarchy, the glorious TSA, a subdivision of your glorious Department of Homeland Security…which is itself a subdivision of Boeing and GE…has gone and reminded us that Ralph Nader tried to warn you.

Faced with thousands of peoples just starting to figure out that Bush fucked things up…the TSA is threatening to detain and or fine any Homelandian who refuses to submit.

The Patriot Act was asked to comment, but as it’s very busy gearing up the TSA detention camps for dissenters, the Patriot Act referred any and all questions regarding freedom, profit and crotch searches to Representative Norm Dicks.

Since most of you are sitting in a ditch somewhere this snowy Monday…cursing the unmanned and untaxed infrastructure…lets take a peek at those three signs of the Apatheticalypse!

Sign number one.  We know that the Apatheticalypse is near, because not unlike ourselves, 92 percent of the occupied Afghanis polled had no idea why the Iraqi’s flew those planes on 9/11.  When polled further, 100 percent of the 92 percent of the occupied Afghanis polled, had never heard of New York City…but were certain that the CIA and Norm Dicks were involved in their having been occupied.

Sign number two of the Apatheticalypse?  Bickleton, Washington!!

Bickleton used to be home to several over-related white families who loved blue birds, but hated the environment and windmills.  Today Bickleton is still white, over-related and blue bird friendly, but it absolutely loves the environment and the money the windmills brought to town.  Bickleton also graduates 100 percent of her students and sends over 90 percent of them to college.

Unfortunately, 98 percent of the college educated Bickletonites, also have no idea why the Iraqi’s flew those Afghani jets on 9/11 either.

Which brings us to sign number three of the Apatheticalypse, the Pope!

Pope Benedict has now decided that condoms are okely dokely okay for male prostitutes.  I’ll give you a Bickleton minute…to come to grips with the fact that the Pope, condom wearing male prostitutes and Bickleton’s Taliban, are all interrelated and tied together by the fact that your Homeland needs to fondle the crotches of you and your children…because freedom isn’t free and the mission is not quite accomplished as of yet.

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