Look Over There! It’s Toyota!
Yes, Toyota. In an unsurprising turn of events, Toyota appears to have lied about their death inducing car troubles, covered it up and made more money in the process.
Sound familiar?
Blackwater has killed more innocent people than Toyota.
Halliburton has killed more U.S. troops trying to take a shower, than Toyota.
Tens of thousands of you Americans die each year for lack of Socialist healthscare. Norm Dicks’ Boeing, CIA interrogators/death squads/drug buyers/patriots, GE, High Fructose Corn Syrup and McDonald’s, do not kill anyone, intentionally?
American humans holding guns, cause tens of thousands of deaths via suicide, murder and a lack of common sense, each year. Please keep in mind, guns do not kill anyone, Toyota does.
Toyota is facing unprecedented attention from Congress, who when not looking into baseball players and their evil lies about steroids…have nothing else to do with the time on their hands.
Yeah, but Representative Waxman has got our backs. Just don’t ask him about torture. Or fake wars for profit.
Toyota, the new distraction. Because looking into anything else, gets people killed and Congress-Humans cut off from their corporate cash machines.
Dumb
I think John Yoo is dumb. He thinks we’re dumb too.
I think Robert Gates is dumber than John Yoo. He thinks the
same of you.
I think Toyota and our Department of Justice are dumber than Yoo too.
They think we’re dumb. Fuck them, fuck Yoo.
I’m not like them. I can pretend…
Maybe we’re all just happy?
K Street, We have a Problem
Trig not being used by mom
K Street and their Congressional employees are not pleased.
They are not pleased because for one, John McCain made this inbred clan, the face of the Republican Party. And Two…more Americans of the moderate to conservative side of the pretend playing field, are
cluing in.
What exactly the FNG’s are cluing into…remains to be seen.
Evidently, someone spilled the beans to the conservatives at this years CPAC meeting.
Bush…8 years of fucking us, Obama…1 year? That don’t add up? War? It’s really, really, really expensive? Who knew? Torture is only torture when an Army General says so…oh? Wow. We’re making more enemies/evil doers by, what’s that you say?…killing their babies and friends who shop? The health care healthscare, is just another giveaway to our former corporatist heroes? Made up wars? Expensive for us, but it makes billions for others? Never ending? Really? But, but…what about Saddam? What about Iran? I hear they’re behind 9/11? Obama is blaaaaaccckkkk!!!
Welcome to the big scary world, conservatives. Ron Paul has gotten to your gray matter, no?
Tell you what, drop the insane racist Teabaggers, Palin, any Fox News teleprompter reader…and maybe we’ll talk.
A united America, is not something the K street Congress or your paranoid Homeland can operate with.
Sleep on it, get back to us. After the revolution, you can go back to watching ‘Walker, Texas Ranger!’ on VHS and diddling your niece.
A Cheney Pearl
Cheney’s little pearls of wisdom, make as much sense as the confused CPAC participants and their straw poll vote for a Presidential Ron Paul.
The dickster has been spewing lies about the size of his penis, the size of his daughter’s penis, coupled with a shout out to Ann Coulter’s unit as well.
Interestingly enough, Colin Powell and General Petraeus say Dick’s words fail to measure up. Thats military speak for Dick’s words don’t mean dick.
Had 5 time deferment Dick gone ahead and served his country during Vietnam, he would have known what the Generals two, think of his Ted Nugent like, shit stained man panties.
Dick Cheney’s pearls of wisdom, are really just this side of a deranged Republican Pearl Necklace…hanging off the throat of a weary America.
My apologies for that horribly horrific mental picture.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
Diaper Change, Tire Change, Regime Change
The progressives, retards, racists and rapturees are getting restless.
Everyone wants change, as long as change doesn’t actually change anything. Torture is not torture, Bush was a genius and Obama is running the Homeland into the ground, by using and expanding, the very same Bush era doctrine of ingeniousness.
We are a nation of lane changers, driving down the crumbling highways of the Homeland to nowhere, with our left or right turn signals stuck in the on position…signifying that we might be changing lanes. Or we might not be.
The Teabaggers are screaming for fiscal responsibility, now that the 8 years of fake Bush wars for Jesus, have drained the Homeland’s bank accounts and their Walmart beer funds of fake, bloated patriotism.
The Democrats sat by for those 8 years and took it up their fake, liberal asses. The Democrats did not meet a Rapture Ready, Bush war/Patriot Act/economy ending proposal, that they would not, not vote for.
How do we get off this crumbling Homeland highway to nowhere? Is there an exit with a Cinnabon or a Starbucks nearby? How do we appease the heavily armed rapturees, the racist teabaggers and the bored to complicity of the Democratic persuasion?
Hell if I know.
Maybe ask the soul searching kabillionaire Bill Gates, who just wants to do good things and be our friend, to finance freelance photographers and independent media/journalists? We could cover events that are not going to be covered well, truthfully or at all…like this one.
Sleep on it Bill and get back to us.
Everyone wants change, yet no one is willing to change a Goddamn thing. Especially if by change, you mean a black man in their White House.
Rebranding Works!
The Iraq War has been rebranded to reflect our kinder, gentler way of occupying you. ‘Operation New Dawn’ is the refreshing new way to keep Americans free from affordable health care.
Rebranding works and it works wonders!
The Afpakistan wars will soon be rebranded and refered to as ‘Operation Blissful Freedom.’
The War on Drugs? ‘Operation Sammy Van Hagar,’ because someone at Homeland hates David Lee Roth.
‘Operation Sarah’s Todd?’ This would be the moniker given for the wars on common sense, the middle class and men who smell like girls.
Can Tiger Apologize for Everything?
So evidently, today’s gihugically important news that must be passed forward via blogs and the old media is…Tiger Woods apologies!
Sure, it’s swell that Tiger has owned up to his shortcomings, why can’t we?
If only President Obama could go on the teevee, apologize to Iraq, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Vietnam, the Balkans, Central, South and North America, Cuba, and so on and so forth, for our wars, occupations and various other crimes against them…how proud would Malia and Natasha be!?
Then, the President could have the Mexican Army arrest the CIA, the FBI, every human at the Pentagon above the rank of Colonel…and all of Dick Cheney’s family.
Unfortunately, we do not live in a James Cameron like world, where eventually, Kevin Costner and the rest of us own up to our shortcomings like Tiger, and help the blue Na’vi because it’s the right thing to do.
We live in a Homeland. Homelands do not right wrongs.
Get over it hippie.
In our Homeland, we fear the shadows of evil doers. The evil doers who hate our freedoms, our Constitution and our laws. Of course we’re too stupid to understand that the shadows we see, are our own.
Why do we hate our freedoms so much?
Ask yourself this. Is Dick Cheney free to walk amongst us? Is he allowed to speak on the teevee box of the glorious Homeland? Why is that? The answers to these questions will set you free. Or get you locked up at GITMO. And therein lies the problem…
Maybe Tiger could apologize for everything we’ve done?
