Harbinger of Worse Wet Things to Come
Thinking and sipping – sipping and thinking
my shade grown while world conquered
perfectly located cup of coffee.
While thinking and sipping at just one of downtown Seattle’s
14,784 perfectly placed Starbucks stores…I found myself craving an apple – an apple that could genetically mutilate a generation or three.
Sipping and craving at one out of 14,784 – perfectly located downtown Seattle Starbucks stores – I watched as the Xenon-133 soaked rain drifted in from the peninsula – soaking Seattle with its harbinger of worse wet things to come.
Faded Hope
And we do eat the apples – and we do walk in the misty harbinger of worse wet things to come.
When you build a new Border Patrol Headquarters in Port Angeles – fewer and fewer Spanish speakers to pick the apples will come.
The poisoned apples are not in Port Angeles – they’re in Wenatchee, Yakima and Brewster.
Ignoring the Border Patrol in Port Angeles is easy – because our biggest Homeland threatening threat – actually comes from ignoring the multiple trillion-dollar…Bush and Obama – wars of never-ending debt.
Cheap power is one of my human rights.
If my computer runs on dead salmon…
then Arianna Huffington’s runs on the lungs of black and or “other” asthmatic while minority – those children who are not white.
The poisoned apples are not in Port Angeles.
Yet not one of the hunted Spanish Speakers
are able to translate ‘La Migra’
into Pashto or Farsi
or even back again.
Sitting, sipping and thinking
at just one of downtown Seattle’s 14,784
perfectly placed Starbucks stores…
I think Kurt Cobain just floated by.
Ignoring the wet harbinger of worse things to come.
I’m not like them
But I can pretend.
Vetting by Al Roker
There are 854,000 people with top-secret security clearances in
the Homeland.
In a few hours, Sarah Palin will serve as a “special guest host” on the Today Show.
Out of 854,000 protectors of all things Homelandian, only one eyebrow, on one Homeland protector’s upper facial region…was raised at this terrorist-like development.
If my Indiana ‘mathin skills’ are still up to snuff, this left just about 853,999 top-secret clearance holding humans available…to catch Ryan Leaf. Again.
If we are to learn anything from any of this, it should be that Al Roker’s vetting process sucks as much as John McCain’s vetting process.
Fools of April
The wars for Lockheed Martin are over!
Veterans health care will now be fully funded
because tax breaks aren’t just for billionaires…
you bet K Street supports the troops.
The WMD’s have just been “relocated” again.
Saddam does laugh with bin Laden
extraordinarily waiting – George Tenet’s rendition to them.
Depending on which vein you inject the Homeland’s heroin through
President Obama might be the most liberal savior we’ve known
or the best conservative since Saint Ronnie’s diaper blew out
trickling-down amongst thou
Patriot Acted thee.
Hanford’s Downwinders have been offered redemption.
DOE’s gesture – reported on All Fools’ Day
because phreedom is actually misspelled
and it rhymes with burping hydrogen gas.
Since Hanford was Fukushima before it was cool
wars then must only be fought by the fodder-classes
for the fodder-classes can’t afford school.
Bank of America does wish you a very merry All Fools’ Day
Afghanistan, Iraq, Yemen and Erik Prince – offer us the same.
The Magnum Dichotomy
Thomas Sullivan Magnum III once said: Normally, the chance to make Higgins sweat would have seemed like a lot of fun.
Today, it barely raised a smile.
When dealing with the couch-bound patriots of the Homeland (Couchicus homelandia), it’s important to take into account the Magnum dichotomy. Was Magnum a man’s man, or was he…not?
If we look for answers from today’s Magnum, we will discover that our couch-bound patriots have over compensated for their Magnum confusion, by proving that over compensation works about as well as invading Iraq, Afghanistan, or Forks, Washington ad nauseum.
The Magnum dichotomy explains much about the couch-bound men of the Homeland. The endless profit wars, torture and impending death of the planet…explains much about the women who support them.
In Homelandia speak – we’re nuts. And only the questionable manhood of Magnum PI can save us. 
This week it was healthscare and a few weeks back it was Lin-sanity, but it will never be – “lets just arrest the bankers, politicians and generals and be done with it” week.
See the outraged Homelandians over the murder of Shaima Alawadi for more.
On one hand, we have the progressives who used to hate everything the idiot Bush stammered for. Now they stand behind the policies of death and profit of the former idiot, because those dead babies in Yemen can’t tell a Bush drone…from a liberal Obama one.
On the other hand, 97% of those who self-identify with any video about small business, tax codes and rabbits that Herman Cain puts out…already don’t believe in science. Which I think clearly proves my original point.
That point being – we’re a delusional bunch…force feeding our children lies in the form of mercury laden food-stuffs, along with the occasional anthrax vaccination.
See the skyrocketing increase of autism in our children for more.
Or try ignoring Fukushima’s non-stop death march for far, far less.
It’s like Bank of America always said…you people are stupid.
If Ralph Nader had been president for the last 11 years,
trying to come to terms with why Higgins was never seen with Robin Masters…might just have been our biggest terrorist threat.
Captain Obvious
Today I awoke with a prophecy. This prophecy told me that soon, very soon, a cup of coffee and a piece of toast would appear. And this prophecy did come to pass.
Events like these are hard to describe to the uninitiated, but suffice to say, they usually start off with the belief that you’re going to bed with Winona Ryder as the prophet…only to awaken with Mel Gibson in
the morning.
Some false prophets are just assholes that way.
Which begs the question: How long will it be until Obama takes our guns
away – just like Clinton did, before we realize that the wars for Bechtel, Boeing and the private prison industry…could have been avoided if only Condi had listened to Richard Clarke?
Since common sense in the Homeland died long before peak oil arrived…do not look for reality to strike anytime soon. Besides, reality’s union was busted by Clinton to make way for mind-numbing stupidity – that has not left us since.
For more, see my date with the false prophet who I thought
was Winona.
For even less, take a peek at what you think Al Roker might know about Fukushima. Then ponder the fake rainwater at Hanford, as it drips upon the workers who’d rather not be there. Perhaps at this juncture, pointing out that all is not well at San Onofre’s plant of magical power that is clean…would be as helpful as reminding us that the last 10 years of wars and bailouts, could have paid for healthcare, jobs and education for about 193 years.
As our planet screams in pain upon deaf human ears, be forewarned that Mel Gibson will strike again.
Beware! Beware the vegans who drink Frappuccino’s at Starbucks
for there’s bug meat in the mix
which means there are vegans at Starbucks.
I swore to who at one time, I thought was Winona – that we should have just listened to Rush…
Vodpod videos no longer available.The Moral Compass-class
Just yesterday, I saw the parking lots of many a worship center
filled with the parked cars of the moral compass-class.
And still – we did kill again.
The parked cars of the moral compass-class run on freedom.
My vehicle’s-class runs on the knowledge that theirs runs on freedom.
Still – we all fill up at the same station.
If President Obama had a son
he might very well look like Trayvon Martin.
If President Obama had a daughter
she might very well look like Shaima Alawadi.
If President Obama had a conscience
it might look like himself sharing a cell with Bush.
Still – we all fill up at the same station.
If Dick Cheney’s surgeon had the conscience of a CIA psychologist
the heart of bin Laden would have sufficed.
Atheists want us to live life before death…
Holy shit that’s nuts!
Affordable healthscare for all sure is frightening
while JoePa’s Sandusky is not.
And still – there is a moral compass-class.
Fukushima is less threatening than the President’s birth certificate.
The dead brown-skinned humans who lived near oil
can’t tell Bush’s birth certificate
from that of Obama’s.
I drove by the parked moral compass-class
their cars run on freedom
my car runs on the knowledge
that 9/11 was too big to fail.
Frickin Lasers
Confucius once said, “Sharks with frickin laser beams attached to their frickin heads can be your worst friend – if not your best frickin enemy.” Or maybe that was Steve Zissou? Either way…our scientists are playing with lasers, desperately trying to screw with fusion and or rip open the fabric of space.
What could possibly go wrong?
It’s not like we’re in the middle of any Earth ending issues like Fukushima, the upcoming water wars, or the far too gullible Bill McKibben and 350.org. Come on Bill…if you’d been reading the Lens for the last 3 years, you would have known that sending petitions to pretend liberal presidents don’t actually end wars, torture, Patriot Acts or even dare I say it…pipelines.
I mean, for Christs sakes, we might as well have a Homeland Senator calling for hearings into the terror that are the NFL bounties…but not the National Nuclear Security Administration’s funding of that awesome frickin laser – for non-military use only of course.
It’s like Gossip Cop is about the only real-world information we can handle.
Steve Zissou once said, “Nobody knows what’s going to happen. And then we film it. That’s the whole concept.”
Frickin lasers.
Vodpod videos no longer available.
The Vigilant Lens 