Grow a Pair
The good war is no more. Say it with me! The good war…is no more!
Amen.
63 percent of the humans polled in a new CNN poll say no more! The good Afghanistan war is good…no more!
Good wars are only fought by those who don’t have to fight them.
Bad wars end when those who started the good wars…pay for
their crimes.
The good war is no more! Say it with me…the good war is no more!
Now we wait. I give it another 12 years or so.
Amen.
A Conservative Democrat
The Homeland continues its glorious slide into a beautiful
Romanist oblivion.
And the useful idiots did argue.
As the useful idiots argue, point fingers and call for the torture and death of each other…the Republicans and their less useful inbred cousins, the Democrats, continue the sell off of our once great experiment to the highest bidders.
Our great experiment of freedom and wholesomeness, was founded upon enslavement and genocide. So it comes as no surprise to anyone but us…that a people would resist being invaded, occupied and droned to death for Boeing, while the survivors are then required to work for Walmart and shop at Starbucks.
Ungrateful servants all.
Unappreciative Child Worker
As the useful idiots scream and yell about yet a different group of brown-skinned humans we’ve enslaved, Bank of America was busy “helping” both sides of the screaming idiot divide, by taking our billions and foreclosing on our McMansions.
The useful idiots clamber for a new leader, argue about the current ones and blame the liberal-conservative agendas of the other.
Patty Murray and Norm Dicks are as culpable as George W Bush and Henry Kissinger. Barack Obama might as well be Dino Rossi.
We broken and beaten citizens of the Homeland are being bled dry, fondled, irradiated and spied upon by the very same party leaders we argue for.
And still we shop.
We the spied upon, spent a record $31 billion dollars this Christmas shopping season. We did it for Jesus, and we didn’t even leave the house!
But still we failed. For we the “Assanged,” did not shop enough due to some snow. It’s never quite enough…and that’s what she said.
The dollars spent by Patty Murray, Norm Dicks and Dave Reichert for the wars against us and the rest of the world…spend well. The dollars not spent for education, health care, roads and a library or 1200…goes just as planned.
And still we shop till we drop.
Now if you’ll excuse me…I’ve got some shopping to do. There’s gas to buy, Wii’s to try and about 300 dollars worth of condoms, books and stuff, all waiting for me at my guilt free Costco.
Boo!
Water is good for the Genetically Modified foods we force upon the world for Monsanto. Water tastes good when it takes on the form of an ice cube. If a tasty ice cube finds itself sitting in a glass of Trader Joe’s Scotch, that was meticulously aged in a plastic bucket for about 6 hours…well, all the better.
Water is also good for Hanford, as it rushes much of our cold war inconveniences—downriver to Portland and their Pearl District liberals.
The water that flows through the Duwamish, is about as good for you as voting for anything that Tim Eyman gets paid for. So it makes perfect Homeland sense, that the Duwamish Tribe of humans should still be fighting to prove that they are in fact—not extinct.
You know, I’m no Newkleeur Fisicist, but I do know what water is supposed to smell like and Boeing’s Duwamish, smells a lot like Vietghanistan.
Water…We need it, we shit in it, we piss in it and we will soon be fighting Arizona for it. Thank God for Bangor, eh?
It’s blatantly obvious Tuesday. Do you know where your thermos is?
Do you know your state’s human cost, or its financial burden in the wars against the rest of the world?
Do not blame the trillions spent for wars, or the trillions spent for Wall Street or the tax breaks for billionaires for your troubles. Blame a liberal, blame a conservative, then just blame your dad.
It’s easier this way.
The wars are free—obviously it’s blatantly obvious Tuesday.
Let’s jump in, before someone refers to me as blatantly obvious.
Obviously…
It’s all so blatantly obvious, no? Enjoy the links, buy Chinese American and eat less sugar…you’ll feel less hosed. Or not.
Rossi Bomb
Twas the night before Christmas and all through the Homeland not a thermos could be found…
Another fear filled travel season has just about ended. Napolitano’s fear factory reminded you of your fear and some of us were afraid. I was reminded that Janet has got to be the gayest man I’ve never been asked or told about.
Perhaps Janet will now serve openly and join the Army? I hear they need a few smarter men, women and Janet’s.
In addition to throwing out your thermos, may I suggest you also throw out NBC, Fox News and Wired. For when we rely on Matt Lauer, Palin’s Beck or Wired’s Kevin Poulsen, you get what you pay for…Janet Napolitano’s talking points in drag.
Wired is to the FBI as Adrian Lamo is to freedom as Private Manning is to Dick Cheney.
Private Manning was somehow able to access secrets so secretive…that no one has yet had to pay for their crimes. Unless of course you fear thermoses. If you fear the thermos, then I suppose you’d have to confuse crimes with truthiness. So PFC Manning’s imprisonment without charges, or Julian Assange’s alleged broken condom against the Homeland..would then count.
When danger lurks, throw out your thermos or watch Jon Stewart. I guess Jon is about the only “Journalist” left, who is able to make our elected representatives act. Jon can also put on a great, moderately safe and boring party too.
When push comes to shove, if PFC Manning is somehow worse than Scooter Libby…then you’ll probably find yourself prosecuted for reading the email of your cheating wife.
Karl Rove thanks you for your fear of the thermos.
Now watch this new TSA video.
All of your questions…will be answered.
Happy Holidays Lens readers of the internets! Peace, love and don’t even think about traveling with your Thermos Brand thermoses because it is after all, a Napolitano Christmas.
Meanwhile, back in our Pakistan where they’re from what I can gather, not too happy with our undeclared war on their kids, a female suicide bomber killed 45 humans and wounded at least 100 others. A thermos was believed to have been used, but one has not yet been placed at the scene.
Throw out your thermoses, ignore your toothache and keep in mind that the trillions of dollars spent for the wars on Islam, do not have an adverse effect on your economy or Janet Napolitano’s savings account.
See ya’ll soon.
If like myself, you link to a fair amount of stupid crap on the tubes and wires of the internets, then you’re probably also being spied on by at least a dozen bespectacled dorks that are armed with badges and guns, but not warrants. Such is life here in the new world order.
If you’re Bryan Fischer, then you’re just a new century Anita Bryant who sleeps with men and writes crazy shit that makes me the apparent front-runner…for this years Colby Award!
It appears that Bryan believes that a birth certificate from Hawaii, is about as real as our Muslim President, who is currently much better at killing Muslims than…”Anita” Bryan himself.
Prineville's Fave
Let it soak in Bry Bry.
Bry Bry also says that President Obama is going to give all of the Homeland back to “the Indians.”
I say fantastic! But I’m fairly confident, that this handover of the Homeland will not go well for the Palin’s, the Abramoff’s or several of the Jesuit Schools.
Retribution is a tough business. Once Russell Means and Leonard Peltier are through with us, there’s also that whole rest of the world problem we have.
Good luck Sarah!!
Bishop Thomas Olmstead of the Diocese of Phoenix, fresh off of his stripping St. Joseph’s Hospital and Medical Center of its Catholic status for having performed an abortion…went ahead and stripped the Homeland of its Catholic status too.
Evidently, Bishop Olmstead had grown weary of our illegal wars of aggression, our torture of illegal POW’s and our penchant for corporate welfare vs. funding school lunches.
According to a few semi-free thinking Bishops like Tom, while abortion ignores the men who impregnate the women, killing brown-skinned kids in Yemen is not exactly pleasing the Lord either.
Obama’s wars drone on and quite frankly, he’s doing a better job of killing Muslims and our troops than Bush did. Hence we have Teabangers and the terrorists at Fox News.
While the Church is no friend to the abused children of the priesthood, it does at some point, pretend to care about the millions of humans killed in our various empire building activities…since as far back as when Columbus first didn’t discover America.
Columbus did discover the “benefits” of slavery…but you know, our history books are full of Napolitanoism’s, so good luck finding your truth.
Happy Holidays and look away from the light!
Salad is the enemy.
Homeland Security is usually a day late and about 800 billion dollars short. Most school districts and several state budgets of the Homeland are about 800 billion dollars short as well…and this of course allows criminals like Erik Prince, to sell Blackwater/Xe with the ever helpful assistance of Bank of America.
As Homeland Security only deals with the pretend threats against the Homeland in a precise and well thought out manner, please be warned that you should now avoid eating at ANY restaurant that has a buffet. Because you’re now a target. And a great big one at that.
Ma Anand Janet?
You know, it’s bad enough that the buffet eaters don’t already fear the food they’re currently piling high on their plates…now they also have to be extra super-duper Vigilant against terrorist attacks, as they forage for freedom.
As per usual, we citizens of the great NW Sector of the Homeland are waaayyy ahead of the curve on this. We’ve been to the Dalles, Oregon and we’ve survived attacks on our salad bars. We know what to look for and if I’m not mistaken, Janet Napolitano looks a bit like Ma Anand Sheela…the best buffet terrorist just that side of Hood River.
Beware your 4th trip to the buffet in 6 minutes…skip the rolls and go right to the dessert…and keep an eye out for women in Rajneesh Red.
