The Tune in W’s Mind
Since I am out of power and my Senator Ted Stevens, lying sack of shit internet connection is also absent, I’ve been forced to commandeer an email machine at a secret, undisclosed location known only to me…to post a tune for W.
Contrary to popular belief, George W. Bush does have the capacity to hold on to a thought for more than 3:40 minutes.
Just replace “rehab” in the song with Bagram, add little George and you have an instant classic. And it is only 3:36 minutes long!
Stupid Comes in Threes
Stupid #1. Ford announces a self-parking system that took 18 months to develop. Do I really have to add anything to this?
Stupid #2. The RNC says Bush is a dumb ass and a lover of socialism. Again, I can add nothing to this to increase the stupid value.
Stupid #3. Big Media types are saying, People Magazine has won the bidding war for the “rights” to share with us the white trash miracle, that is Bristol Palin’s baby. How much does it cost to exploit the results of children having sex? $300.000… Thanks People Magazine! You truly bring stupid to a whole new level.
Liquor is Quicker and it Fixes Stuff Too!
Your purchase of yet another shitty bottle of tequila, adds dollars to the State General Fund, cities and counties, the Basic Health Program and more. Last year, your purchases of shitty tequila, added more than $322 million dollars to government programs. Celebrar una fiesta!
According to The News Tribune, humans may be losing their homes, jobs, savings and hair, yet they continue to party on. Check it out, here.
There was no mention of adverse health effects, mixed messages, drunks driving over other humans, or why marijuana, prostitution and Celine Dion are not legalized, taxed and their use encouraged in newspaper articles.
Am I a downer or what?
Watch my drunk Swedish friends below. It should help.
Homeland Security Meeting
Surveillance video!
Michael Chertoff!
The Department of the Glorious Homeland Security in action!
Come on. You know the real meetings are much worse. I bet they even told fart jokes before giving the Border Patrol the keys to the Constitution.
Highway to Hell
Once again, driving is the theme of the day. The reverse I-90 trip is upon me. The Highway to Hell? A fantastic voyage? I think you know where I’m headed with this.
Coming soon to the Vigilant Lens, Sequim’s regrets and more Republican stupidity. Stay tuned…
Meanwhile, I’m going back to PT, PT, PT.
Be Vigilant!
Survive the Drive
Mountains, snow, rusty ferries, 7 pit stops, too much coffee and I-90 drivers. In other words, have a good holiday…I’m out for a couple days.
Trent gives us some music to survive I-90 by with a dose of propaganda and a touch of revisionism.
Be vigilant.
Snowing Like It’s 1991
What better way to warm up than watching my favorite hair farmers from back in the day, Soundgarden.
Today we get to see some of the Jesus Christ Pose video that drove MTV and crew cut humans from those days…insane with pretend outrage. The interview with the band is entertaining as well.
Enjoy the snow, the rain will soon return.
