Of Bar Stool Rental Quagmires
In all of the bars
In all of the towns I’ve been
There were probably only six to seven
That were worthy of my drunken bar ownership dreams
Sure that number was probably closer to eleventeen
But most drunken bar ownership dreamers
Neverth dreamed at tshe barths I’ve been
Fornication Confirmation
generally
holding a drunken rubber chicken in chaps by the neck
isn’t all that newsworthy
unless
a royal couple does it
i guess
Bob Cost Us
Bob Costas Bob Costas
What did Bob cost us?
It wasn’t all that long ago
That I quit watching millionaires bash their brains to death for beer and car commercials
Call me newly old-fashioned
But I can watch brain-dead people super-duper-size their fries to death
Almost anytime I like
Bob Costas Bob Costas
What did Bob cost us?
Did Bob remind us of Pine Ridge?
Did Bob remind us of Guantanamo?
Perhaps Bob linked Katrina with Sandy?
Or maybe BofA with (add your town’s budget crisis here)
No!
Bob did not remind us of Pine Ridge
No!
Bob did not snivel on about Guantanamo
Hurricanes happen to poor people
Banks happen to poor people too
Bob Costas Bob Costas
What the fuck did Bob cost us?
He cost us 90 seconds of the millionaires bashing their brains to death
For some beer and a Chrysler
Of course I’d like fries with that…
Thanks!
Related articles
- The Internet Would Rather Make Fun of Bob Costas Than Solve a Football Murder (theatlanticwire.com)
Convince Them to Buy
Explaining North Korean state-sponsored nationalism to any 6 year-old American is easy
Just line them up at school every morning
And have them pledge their allegiance
Explaining The Homeland’s state-sponsored nationalism to any 10 year-old just droned Afghan child
Is a bit tougher
***
And now…a little relevant Sunday morning music.
Thanks for stopping by
Be careful from whom you buy…
Unrest in the Forest
It may have never before been said that
People will put strange things in trees
It may also have never before been said that
The chances of someone taking a picture of it
Are better than one would think
Mainly
i wasn’t expecting the Mexican Navy today
mainly
this is because nobody ever expects the Mexican Navy
Us from Them
The Harbor Defense Command of Puget Sound used to be in charge of protecting us from them
The bluffs were alive with armaments
The Army posts were alive with men
We were protected
And we were ready
For them
No one ever attacked Puget Sound
No armaments were ever fired at the “thems”
Now iPhones, I-5, and Polybrominated diphenyl ethers are attacking Puget Sound
And there’s still no “thems”
It’s just us
It’s just us
Unless you count the remaining concrete steps
Of Puget Sound’s Harbor Defense Command
Baby steps
Forever steps
Us
From them
The Vigilant Lens 