Fake Twain
It seems to me gentleman, that if we tried harder to be #3 instead of #1…our inevitable fall to number #6 would be far easier on the help. – Fake Mark Twain
***
Strong Back — Poor Comma Placement
It has always been and probably always will be…
That a strong back will get you employed faster for less,
Than an inexplicable photo, coupled with poor, comma, placement.
Surrounded by Surface
Surface
itching
scratching
bleeding
empty
scars
tears
anger
tears
scars
empty
bleeding
scratching
itching
Surface
***
Totally My Fault
I once saw a man in a suit
Who’d had the good fortune
To be carrying a salmon
I once saw a man in a suit
Who’d had the good fortune
To be carrying a salmon
Though I was not carrying a camera
Damn you fortunate-suited salmon carrying man!
David Vitter’s Diaper Supports Gonzaga
Quick!
What’s the craziest cash crop in Washington State?
Apples? Potatoes? Marijuana? Or closeted conservatives?
Fast!
How many statues of child endangering dead white men,
Can you find on the campus of Gonzaga University?
Count as slow as you can.
What the?
If Washington State’s closeted conservatives feared the tiny parasites
That control their minds,
As much as they don’t fear Vitter’s diaper,
Or Newt’s Callista,
Or Nethercutt’s term limits,
Or a moderate Gonzaga season…
The death throes of insanity.
Like the Seattle Times’ shrinking profits,
Smaller is cute,
Especially when we’re discussing nuts.
Can Jesus Traverse Idaho?
it has been brought to my attention
that jesus has left chicago for new orléans
there’s much left to be done in chicago
but new orléans is mighty close to mississippi
so i don’t know when
and i’m not really sure how
but i hope jesus makes it past idaho on his way to washington
we could use the help
but Oh-My-God Idaho…
***
If We Knew What the News Knew It’d Be News to Us
Journalism!
It’s all in your head.
***
The Vigilant Lens 