Great News America!
55% of Republicans polled, say the party should be a bit slower witted and even further out of touch with reality, just like Sarah Palin.
In related news of the stupid, Joe the Fake Plumber/War Correspondent Wurzelbacher, will be joining GOP congressional aides for a meeting of the Conservative Working Group. The usual attendees at these meetings are Capitol Hill staffers, who meet to plan out GOP strategies for the week.
Apparently, Joe will be discussing his disgust with the currently proposed version of the stimulus package. Because you know, it helps people like Joe. And stuff…
Tuesdays Darwin Award goes to you, Republican congressional aides! Because you still don’t have a fucking clue.
February Corollary
Some humans actually drink Bud Light. It also comes in Lime flavor.
Border Patrol agents are fluent in Spanish but not French, Chinese, Farsi or Korean.
Retroactive Executive Privilege. That means you’re a dumb ass, in Farsi.
Happy February!
Limbaugh’s Tool
Rush Limbaugh is the face of the Republican Party. Rush is a recovering drug addict, a well paid clown and a lover of Dominican Republic nightlife. You were expecting the Pope?
So lock up your children and Hillbilly Heroin…puffy is in the house.
The Morning Beer Post
One of my stalkers sent me this…I will never, never be able to pay you back for this. No really, I mean it.
Screw snarky political observations. Give me beer.
A Long Slog
Slogs can be long and hard. But Defense Secretary Robert Gates did not mention the firmness, or lack thereof, when talking about our Afghanistan slog.
Secretary Gates did use words like, “deeply skeptical“, “modest” and “realistic” in reference to our goals in Afghanistan. To round out his afternoon, Secretary Gates also said, “My worry is that the Afghans come to see us as part of their problem rather than part of their solution, and then we are lost.” Just a bit late to be worried about the Afghans feelings…don’t ya think Bob?
For those of you counting at home, we’ve “officially” been in Afghanistan since October of 2001. Unofficially, we’ve been fucking things up over there for decades. Ask Norm Dicks. At this juncture, I would think it’s safe to say, that the Afghan people see no difference between us and the Soviets.
Here’s a fun idea for you President Obama, send little Bob Gates back to Bellingham and give him a fucking medal. I mean really, if history is to be used as an indicator of our performance in the Middle East, and beyond…I think the words cluster fuck, sums things up quite nicely.
And when you say cluster fuck, who’s name comes to mind as the new Secretary of Defense? Well my friend Ashton Kutcher of course. He’s fun, he parties, drops the F Bomb, and Demi, Bruce and the kids get to hang out at the Pentagon. How cool is that?
Mull that over for awhile Mr. President. Besides, I’m confident Ashton would perform as well, if not better, than most of the last three decades worth of DOD Secretaries.
Why? How?
Who decided that Ashton Kutcher was deserving of fame, fortune and freedom from reality? Whoever you are, perhaps you should sit and watch a half-hour’s worth of Ashton’s work. I’d wish that on no one…except you, Ashton Kutcher pusher.
I was present at a function honoring Tom Skerritt recently. Tom is just an actor. Unlike Ashton, Tom is alert, humble and has an awareness of the world and it’s current events. When you are in the presence of people like Tom Skerritt, Sherman Alexie or even a Border Patrol agent, you want to ask them questions…you want to engage them. Not so much with Ashton.
Ashton? Even though you’ve repented, tell you what. Give all your money to charity, join the Marine Corps, shut the fuck up.
And…scene.
Black Thursday
Are you ready? A one day strike by hundreds of thousands of workers begins today. Government, transportation, hospitals, power companies and schools…all shut down.
These workers are protesting against the government’s handling of the economy and those bailout gifts. The bailouts of financial institutions and auto makers will cost trillions, while jobs are lost and far too many people suffer.
Unfortunately, today’s one day strike by the people, is in France.
We Americans will be busy buying shitty beer and chips for Super Bowl Sunday, while simultaneously bitching about the price of gas and a Happy Meal. Or depending on one’s outlook, bitching about the price of shade grown, organically harvested and child labor free avocados.
To the streets my people…Revolution! Well, nah. Fuck it. I need to wash my truck.
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