Illiterate Rainbows Lead to Pete Hoekstra

Bruce Willis has an office at NASA, the Pentagon and the Dept. of Agriculture.  Bruce is like the man we all wished Colin Powell was supposed to have been.

Mr. Willis did once manage to accidentally stop an earth ending asteroid from wiping us out…but in the end, all Bruce really gave us was Ashton Kutcher.

I think Ben Affleck or even Billy Bob Thornton would have done better by us…but very few men have ever been able to say no to Cybill Shepherd.

The only man to have ever said no to Cybill, was LeVar Burton.  LeVar has taught We the Patriot Acted, far more than any other entity has ever been able to stomach us.

There was Roots, where we learned that our not so distant past, was  nothing like Pete Hoekstra thinks it was.  With Star Trek, we learned that blind people of color, make far better Starship Engineers than Pete Hoekstra or Axl Rose’s Chinese Democracy theory…combined.

It was LeVar’s Reading Rainbow, that taught generations of us to not listen to genocidal maniacs such as Pete Hoekstra.  But…once Reading Rainbow went off the air, all bets were off.  Because as if by divine intervention…the shallow end of the gene pool did expand to even shallower depths, than previous shallowness was even known to have existed.

See Pete Hoekstra for more.

There is some good news though.  LeVar has seen enough.  LeVar is bringing back Reading Rainbow as an App…because today’s kids were so damaged by M.I.A.’s finger salute at the Super Bowl, that many of them forgot all about the beer commercials.

I don’t envy the work that LeVar has cut out for himself.  It was one thing to teach us about slavery and handi-capable space travelers…but attempting to teach us that people of all colors can be conservative?  Wow.  I wish you luck LeVar.

For tonight’s VLens homework, two things.  One – remember that President Obama is only as conservative as it takes to keep Guantanamo open, while keeping the Super PAC money coming in…and two – why not consider voting for Gary Busey in November?

Sure that’s more like three things, but like the lobbyists for Lockheed Martin sometimes say: Charge the Army $125 for a roll of toilet paper, and everyone freaks out.  Spend a few trillion dollars on ending the planet, and they’ll blame Sean Penn.

I’ll let you figure out – how it all pertains.  Happy Birthday!