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Top 2011 Lists Are So 2010

December 30, 2011

Word on the mean streets of Tenino, Washington, has it that 2011 is on its way out.  Like a 12 pack of José Cuervo 1/2 gallon jugs at Costco…we should probably just chalk up most of 2011 to being drunk.  We can then blame 2011 on a Cuervo blackout, which I suppose is as good a reason as any for best of lists like this!

The Vigilant Lens Top 2011 List of Random/Top Stuff.

*Best Place – Iraq.  It still doesn’t have any WMD’s, but Saudi Arabia will soon have more.

*Best Bass Player – I think if pushed, I’d have to give it to Cliff Burton – even though he died in 86′.  So when pushed further, I’d go with Geddy Lee, but since I just read Duff’s Best of Random Stuff List…I guess I’ll give him the title for 2011 – as well as 1987.

*Best Mention of Johnny Depp in a Public Setting – I gotta go with Ricky Gervais at the Golden Globes.  I’m giving myself a shout-out as well, for my poorly thought out work in Benny-Mitchell-Jessen and Joon.  Because I can, and because I’m an only child.

*Best Self-Mention for Stuff Actually Produced in a Year Other Than 2011 – That’s a toss-up between myself for the above linked post and Sarah Palin.  It’s like all of our best work is behind us?

*Best Occupation – I’m giving this one to Portland, just because I used to drink there.  An honorable mention goes to the rest of us.  At least this is what the Lakotah humans tell me.

*Best Use of the Word ‘Fuck’ – Hands down winners…the Journalists at The Exiled.  Why not go there and ditch the Huff/Holland?

*Best 35mm SLR’s – Pentax.  Although I wouldn’t know how the newer Pentax’s are, as I can’t afford them.  I’m still using a Pentax K-1000…that I’ve modified with duct-tape and a pink-digital point and shoot from Nikon.  The pictures are OK and the PJ’s in the streets love it.  Though none of them will follow me on Twitter.

*Best Band Get Back Together – Soundgarden.  That is all.

*Best TeeVee ShowPortlandia.  Mainly because Drugstore Cowboy doesn’t sell Sleater-Kinney t-shirts…and Portland Wrestling from about 1980 through 1989 no longer breathes.

*Second Best TeeVee Show – Northern Exposure.  Nothing says 2011 better than Maurice J. Minnifield (the 1 %), Fleischman (Death Panels), Chris Stevens (activist/artist/starving), or Ed (me).

*Best War of 2011? – All of them.  It’s a growth industry and growth industries are what we’re all about.

Merry New Year and onward to looking backwards!
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