Drugstore Blowjob Bowl

Since I wanted my Super Bowl prediction to stand out from the rest, I thought what better way than porn, drugs and a Hasselbeck!

I hereby predict that Matt Hasselbeck and Jon Kitna will attend a religious porn festival.  Fumbling will happen and the gift of tongues will ensue…Elizabeth Hasselbeck will appear and her presence alone…will cause the Steelers to lose by 13.

I call it the Hassle Factor.

I’m also predicting that if the Drugstore Cowboy author (James Fogle) is ever arrested again, it will be for knocking off a drugstore…

I further predict that a Drugstore Cowboy sequel will be made.  Joaquin Phoenix will play the role of Matt Dillion’s Bob Hughes, because Kelsey Grammer turned the gig down.

Predictions sure are difficult to predict.

Who could have predicted that Jordan would be so much better than Sam Bowie?  How could we have known that Clinton’s blow job investigation would cost $40 million dollars?  Who knew that the FCIC investigation would only require $8 million dollars, to tell us that the Bush Depression was avoidable?

Who?  Why…how?  What?

Sam Bowie, Jordan…Iraq, WMD’s…JPMorgan Chase and Hasselbeck.

WTF?

Predictions are guesses.  Advice is free.  If you’ve got an addiction to porn, don’t look to me.  Skip Monica Lewinsky, have a light snack…call on Jon Kitna and Matt Hasselbeck!