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Attention Walmart Patriots

December 8, 2010

As you patriots of the Walmart shopping sector know, we’re at war.  At any given moment, it is possible that a brown-skinned terrorist human, may jump out at you as you patriotically shop your way between the $3 t-shirt section and the Miley Cyrus bra and poster sections.

Do not be alarmed patriots!  Yes, there are many brown-skinned shoppers at your Walmart…just turn them in…and we’ll do the rest!

Janet is so distracting, is she not?

You must be distracted from the crazy, treasonous Australian, who dares show you just a smidgen of what we’re actually up to.  Vietghanistan only goes well for those who are profiting from it, like Triple Canopy and Raytheon.  You must be distracted from the Kyoto agreement that the Homeland will not sign.  You should not recall that Dick Cheney outed a CIA officer.  Please refrain from speaking out, as your TSA searches your baby girl and her crotch for explosives.  Do not concern yourself with Israel.  Israel has absolutely nothing to do with anything.

Be not aware of the wars against Islam, marijuana and you’re right to read about your country’s misdeeds.

Julian Assange, Mexicans and those who will not join with us will be assimilated.

The tax breaks for the rich will trickle down to you in the form of constant war and a perpetual lack of funding for things like schools, food and state parks…did you hear thatI think there’s a Taliban insurgent in the electronics section!!

Remember patriotic shoppers of the Walmart sector, President Obama is a Democrat. Given two years…he might end the wars, punish the rich and invite you untouchables…to work, live, love and be happy.

Be Vigilant…for truth, justice and liberty…do not mix well with the Homeland.


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2 Comments
  1. Ginger permalink
    December 9, 2010 01:02

    If you see something, say something…. something like THIS!

    Like

    • December 9, 2010 09:18

      I’m reporting this to my nearest Napolitano approved, Walmart manager!!

      The humanity.

      Thanks Ginger.

      Like

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