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Cigarettes Bad, Torture Good

November 10, 2010

In the Homeland, short, easily digested propaganda…works better than the fifth grade.

I knows edumication in this here land sucks ass, but I also knows that endless war creates jobs and wealth for those who deserve it more than I do.

I’m confused, but happy to know that smoking and tobacco is are bad for me and my meth addicted baby…just like Islam and Mexican drug warlords…is are twoo.

443,000 peoples of the Homeland die every year from tobacco.  46 million adults smoke the stuff, while almost 20 percent of our bored high school kids enjoy it too.

Why we have yet to invade, conquer and spread Democracy here…I do not know.

George W Bush said that torture was legal, because some attorney made sure that Obama would not prosecute him for it.

I buy that.

The CIA, the FBI and Saudi Arabia let those Iraqi/Afpaki terrorists attack us on 9/11, because jobs for Halliburton and Boeing were needed.

The murder of 443,000 Homelandian’s per year occurs, because R.J. Reynolds and friends…hate our freedoms.

The wars against Islam, common sense and marijuana occur, because our edumication cistum sucks ass and we beeliefe what criminals like Representative John Shimkus…have to say.

Couple that with our fear of gay sex, masturbation and PBS…and well, you might as well take up smoking.

  1. jjrad permalink
    November 11, 2010 08:17

    Glad he read from the bible and not some other text. Note the interns behind him trying to hide as they realize – the camera is on them as well and their careers just went in the toilet.


    • November 11, 2010 17:50

      I wouldn’t hire them to flip urinal cakes, but as the Homeland goes…they should probably buy some sunglasses, as their K Street futures are bright.


  2. barman permalink
    November 11, 2010 15:02

    Infallible and unchanging!

    Man, I hope they got the transcription right!

    I quit smoking already. It was torture.



    • November 11, 2010 18:02

      I’ve inhaled and chewed the evil plant…I quit when smokes hit about 80 cents a pack, chewing? About 2 days before the end of my illustrious AF career.

      The Homeland could use a younger Mel Brooks about now…maybe Kucinich? His latest should piss off a few…and the rest will ignore…but I give him an A for effort.


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