Fear of an Unreadable Yardstick

Back in 75′, my 5th grade teacher repeatedly warned us of the impending apocalypse that was the fast approaching metric system.  Apparently lives would be lost, crops would fail and not-white kids would then be allowed to sit with us at lunch.

Being able to eat with a few kids who didn’t necessarily hunt squirrels or smell of corn?  Who knows, maybe my 5th grade Indiana class could have turned out somewhat less like squirrel eaters who smelled of corn.

The rantings of one teacher…can influence a generation of fear-ridden children who grow up to allow Patriot Acts.  The theological rantings of just one teacher…can influence a generation of fear-ridden children, who grow up believing that never-ending wars for Lockheed Martin don’t somehow hurt the pretend economy.

Who fears a black conservative president more than the white ones who acted just like him?
Many of us.

Who fears the invading hordes of CIA armed terrorists if we don’t let the NSA steal our emails?
Most of us.

Who forgot why we attacked Afghanistan because Iraq didn’t attack us ever either?
Most of us.

Who let Karl Rove go free?
All of us.

A Homelandian yard is equal to one Taliban 0.9144 metre.  As far as many of us know, that’s like 23 Burrito Supreme’s laying end to end at any Taco Bell.

The fear of an unreadable yardstick—made for a nation of those who still can’t read the squirrel huntin’ approved one.

I’m thinking that was pretty much the plan.