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Attention Span of a Newt

March 10, 2010

Remember when gas cost more?  I think I recall our invasion of Afghanistan about a decade ago, because they harbored the al Qaeda/Saudi Arabians who attacked America.  Or was that Iraq?  No, no I think it was Iran and North Korea that teamed up with Cuba and Venezuela that were to blame.  Because they hate our freedoms?

At any rate, thank God President Obama is still fighting the good fight.  We’re still battling the evil Taliban in Afghanistan, because they hate women and our corporations need the contracts.  Besides, they know too much about Representative Norm Dicks and his pals at CIA.

Iraq is now the new forgotten war, because we forgot about Vietnam.  Gosh!  Democracy spreading sure can be difficult!  Those occupied humans just don’t enjoy being invaded and occupied to death!

When our POW’s were tortured in Vietnam, Korea and WWII, it made us angry.  Now that we torture our POW’s…it’s cool.  In fact it’s so cool, Pelosi took it off the table, Cheney got away with it and Obama moved on!

At least I think that’s what happened.  I can’t remember because I’m very concerned about the fake health care thingy, death panels and Dennis Kucinich, who I’m told, is to blame for it all?  Wow, that’s “interesting.”  Thanks Markos, you strange little Huffington.

Democrats are very confusing.  They’re against every morsel of the bad stuff, even while they’re fucking us all in the proverbial rear end of freedom and liberliness.  At least they use condoms.

I don’t know.  Perhaps it’s better to just go shopping and vote with my apathy.  We’re probably all better off having attention spans of a Newt and or a 3-year-old.

Like I sometimes say, it’s far better to be outraged on the couch at home, than caught without a weapon at Starbucks.

Guns don't kill people, double tall halfcaf decaf girly mochas do

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