Well That Doesn’t Seem Right?
We is America! How in the name of all that is Santa Claus can we be 13th in the entire world in Human Development? 37th in the world in quality of Healthcare? We’d have to be at Red China levels of truthiness about our Bush bailouts, the Reagan legacy and war.
It just does not make any sense?
Oh my bad, that’s right. We are at Red China levels of truthiness.
We lie about everything. We lie to ourselves, we lie to our neighbor. We lie about how long 9 inches really is and we protect the liars who lie about more than we could even dream of lying about. Santa is a lie I still have not come to terms with, religion, vehicle MPG’s, how tall we are, Columbus Day and Thanksgiving.
Can we at least get rid of Christopher “fucking liar” Columbus Day? We might as well make it the Glorious National Day of George W Bush, if the size of the lies are any indicator.
We torture people to death and blame the tortured. We half impeached a President for receiving a sloppy blow job. We lied about Iraq, Afghanistan, Central America and steroids in baseball.
Iran and their bomb making abilities? How much you wanna bet? And if Iran can make the bomb, how much you wanna bet that technology came from us? Via Turkey.
Lies are woven into the fabric of America. Ask a Lakota. Better yet, ask a Blackwater/Jeppesen Dataplan/Halliburton employee about lies. Of course you’ll need to bribe them with cash or immunity.
Congress? The President? CIA? Capitalism? The offensive coordinator for your Seattle Seahawks? JFK? The bailouts for billionaires? Lying liars and lies.
High fructose corn syrup? Milli Vanilli? Vietnam, Desert Storm, Dick Cheney or the goddamned Food Pyramid?
If I’m lyin…I’m not dyin. I’m American. Deal with it.
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The Vigilant Lens 
There are a lot of places between #1 and #36 I would like to move to. Unfortunately, they don’t want us to live there – a visit is about all I can get. I am considering running the border – into Canada.
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Since most self respecting countries will soon not let us in…
We’re all going to have to vacation in Alabama.
It’s like another world!!
Yet worse.
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Well, it’s not like everyone in the US is getting #37 quality health care. No… it’s kind of an average. A few get health care in the #1 and #2 range. They’re pretty darn vocal about not wanting to change a thing. Then there’s a slightly larger handful who get health care in the #3 to about #5 range. They don’t want to rock the boat. And they’re scared.
It’s the majority in the #70 and below range that’s bringing the average down.
Now, here’s the Republican plan: Let all those loosers and whiners die and suddenly our average goes waaayyyy up!
And we won’t have to spend one penny in taxes, either! Win!
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