Suffering Canaries

We are suffering canaries who have the ability to unlock our cages and leave the coal mine. But we will not.

I don’t know about you, but I like my cage. A bit of fresh newspaper, beer and a Slim Jim…and I’m as happy as a Young Republican!

Today’s tell tale signs of canary death.

Corn Syrup. Bad for you to begin with. Try our new mercury flavor!
Blowfish Testicles. Or, canaries proving Darwin’s theory.
The NSA. Listening to you and the 9/11 hijackers. Michael Hayden…just a data mining coal mining canary user.
German Shepard Love. Oregon couple who enjoyed their dog, way too much. No word yet from the Portland mayor haters.
Climate Change. Too late canaries!

Well that was a downer of a post for hump day.